Your butt needs a lot of things. It needs to be stretched so your muscles don’t tense, it needs a good pair of jeans that’ll worship it in its current state of somewhere between pancake and bubble, and it needs pizza, but it does not need a contouring palette.

So what on earth was Cosmopolitan thinking when they made a video teaching women how to contour their booties? This kind of stuff can’t end well. They’ve got to know that, right?

We all know that this is teaching women they aren’t good enough as they are, but it’s also TOTALLY impractical.

1. I’m not spending $50 on a contouring palette so that I can rub it on my butt instead of my face.
2. Who is going to sit there and contour your butt for you? Anyone that is getting that close to it probably likes it just the way it is.
3. Doing this for the beach? Colored sand stuck to your butt or streaky makeup in the water will probably draw the wrong kind of attention.
4. Who wants to come away from a loving butt grab with a palm full of makeup?!

It’s just not worth it. If you feel the need to change your booty, do some squats, but put the foundation brush down. The video is below purely for giggles.