Maybe it’s the constant smell of cinnamon sugar in the air or the fact that “Santa Baby” is always playing on the radio, but something about the holidays makes women want to throw on a slinky sheer red nightie lined in white fur, and that’s totally cool if you’re into it. We could give you some reasons why dressing like Lindsay Lohan at a high school holiday talent show is overrated this sleep season, but we’re not here to school you.
We are, however, posing the idea that onesies–the cozy pajamas everyone hates to love– can be just as appealing as anything Lindsay would smash watermelons in. Consider these seven reasons why a festive holiday onesie beats that Santa lingerie you’ve been hiding in the back of your closet since last year. Ready, set, go.
1. Onesies leave everything to the imagination. Literally. Everything from the neck down is a big ‘ole mystery. And what’s sexier than that?
2. On that note, you can get away with hairy legs. If Santa sexytime isn’t in the cards for you this holiday season (or even if it is), a onesie will prevent any annoying family member from doing that really hilarious thing where they touch your prickly legs and scream “youch!”
3. You’ll avoid awkward encounters. Imagine this. You’re at your SO’s parents’ house for the holidays. You wear your sexy Santa negligee to bring a little ho ho holiday spirit into your relationship. It’s 7 a.m. and your bladder is about to explode, so you quietly sneak into the hall but you’re still dressed like Mrs. Claus on her honeymoon. All of this could have been avoided had you packed your holiday onesie.
4. They’re SFW. Holiday work party wardrobe dilemma? There’s a onesie for that.
5. They’re warm as toast. Onesies are like a full-on electric blanket you can wear. Does anyone actually enjoy freezing their buns off in lingerie in the middle of December?
6. They’re appropriate for any shenanigans you might get yourself into. Playing Monopoly by the fire with mom? Check. Hanging stockings by the chimney with care with grandma? Yup. Sexy time? Obviously. Taking the garbage out? Onesie have you covered there too (literally).
7. You feel like a kid again. And isn’t childhood innocence the reason for the season?
